I haven't stopped chuckling this evening since I read a post on Spittoon.Biz, a long running wine blog run by Andrew Barrow over in the UK. About a week ago he reported on the latest marketing efforts by a national supermarket chain to make sure the wine labels on their wines were readable by all their clientele (UK supermarkets often bottle and label their own wines from around Europe). These efforts involved something quite straightforward: translating the back labels of the wines into different languages.
Except the languages they translated them into are some of the local dialects of the United Kingdom. This yielded labels like:
"A canny Merlot ableeze wi succulent blackcurrants an blueberries. This Merlot has legs leik a thoroughbred, strong an forward, tha sucks the leif oot of yer palate. Its stowed bouquet is a delight fer yer nose an will leave yee clamming fer moor. This ain ne blash." in Geordie.
"A totally stoatin bevvy. It's bricht an' foo o' flavur, wi plum, curranty fruit, mackin it taste awffy braw. A youngane's colour wi cherries an black fruit on the nose, it has a laldy kick tae it, tha runs fae the front tae the back ae' yer mooth" in Scottish.
That just makes me giggle. What if Trainspotting was filled with wine instead of heroin?
Or better yet, maybe we can get some labels written in Jive:
The Seven Percent Solution Tasting: May 11, Healdsburg, CA Vinography Images: Green But Getting There Churton Wines, Marlborough, New Zealand: Recent Releases A Dark Day For Wine Lovers How to Love Italian Wine or Die Trying: A First Timer's Guide to VinItaly Stella di Campalto, Castelnuovo dell'Abate, Italy: Current Releases 2013 Anderson Valley Pinot Noir Festival: May 17-19, Philo, CA Vinography Images: Cover Crop Grape Pickings for US Lawyers When it Comes to Rosé, Italy Gives France a Run for the Money
Masuizumi Junmai Daiginjo, Toyama Prefecture Wine.Com Gives Retailers (and Consumers) the Finger 1961 Hospices de Beaune Emile Chandesais, Burgundy Wine Over Time The Better Half of My Palate 1999 KirÃ¡lyudvar "Lapis" Tokaji Furmint, Hungary What's Allowed in Your Wine and Winemaking Why Community Tasting Notes Sites Will Fail Appreciating Wine in Context The Soul vs. The Market 1989 Fiorano Botte 48 Semillion,Italy